“I’m Sorry?”
“Uz thus yer fust tum un Nuw Zulund???”
Hang on a minute, this is meant to be Australia 2, didn’t expect there to be a language barrier! It would appear the kiwis have a interesting twist on the English language as well. All soft ‘e’s become ‘I’s and all soft ‘I’s become ‘u’s. So the phrase “Ben put out the bins” would become “Bin put out the buns”. Bizzare.
Anyway, after a riduclously early start and a greeting by the check in staff at Melbourne airport that was just FAR too camp for that time in the morning (“oooo sir haven’t YOU got a big bag!!”), my day was pretty good. It went a little something like this:
3 x bloody mary
1 x champagne
2 x red wine
1 x gin and tonic
1 x port
2 x beer
2 x vodka and orange
1 x cider
1 x Guiness
1 x vomit
1 x Jager Bomb (Jager Meister dropped into red bull)
1 x kebab
Before I knew it I was lying in a dark room at 2am watching Saving Private Ryan on 2 TVs in a hostel in Auckland. Although Im pretty sure there was only 1 screen and I was seeing 2. Success!
Not sure what possessed me to sample pretty much every type of alcoholic drink in one day but it worked. Managed to get up and stumble around the city for the next few days which seemed kinda like a ‘Sydney Lite’ on first impressions. Met up with a pal Id met in Perth (good ol’ kitty Kat) for a few drinkies and reminiscing. Also booked up some extreme activities and some transport for the coming weeks. Lets do this!
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